Desperate Measures

Carl Clerkin

10 September 2008


Carl Clerkin spent a good part of last year living in a house without any services. Due to these conditions, heI had to be extra resourceful, mostly with buckets. Here is a collection of buckets made fit for purpose. The aim is to question what we think we want, what we would like and what we actually need, to explore what happens when aspirations are super-seeded by desperation. Once Paul had came back to finish the plastering all the toilets had been removed from site. 
“What do you do about going to the toilet then?” he asked 
“Just piss in a bucket and chuck it down the man hole” I told him 
“What about having a shit?” says Paul

“Same thing” I say 
“What bucket?” he asks, in a disgusted tone. 
“Your bucket, sorry Paul” I say 
“You know the Plasterers bucket is sacred and yet 
with all these other fucking buckets around here you shit in my one, why?” 
“It’s the perfect height” I say 
Paul goes on a mad rant about how “that bucket’s yours now man” and “I don’t want nothing to do with it now”, so I let him go off for a while, then say “I’m only joking Paul, it’s not true. I just connect the toilet back up, shit, then flush with a bucket of water” 
This was actually the truth but Paul didn’t believe me, he was convinced I’d soiled his bucket and he wasn’t happy. 
Later on I saw Paul out in the garden, he was circling the bucket, then to my delight he mimed like he was taking a shit in it. As soon as his arse touched the bucket he jumped up shouting “You bastard, you did shit in that bucket, you’re right it is the perfect height. How would you know otherwise?” 
”I’m a furniture designer, I know these things” 
I replied.